My 2024 Fall Obsessions
HussyCore
If well-behaved women rarely make history, then hussycore is where it’s at. Last summer, I rewatched Desperately Seeking Susan, mesmerized by the fashion and brazen regard for sex appeal. The film’s trashy, romantic grit and hussy spirit steals the show, commanding every inch of the screen; it commands the locations, the sets, the lighting, the magic tricks, the glorifying of Madonna— WHERE HAS THIS HUSSY SPIRIT GONE, HOLLYWOOD? Bring back the teased hair, the exposed bra, the hoes in their hose. Oh, how I miss the derelict nature of an opened-toed shoe over stockings. I wanna call my blush “rouge.” Wanna kick off my undies into my ”pile of knickers.” This fall, I am paying homage to hussycore, whatever that might mean. If I had to put a face on it, I’d say “the hussy spirit” is Carol Burnett in Annie. Not Miss Hannigan—Carol Burnett playing Miss Hannigan. The gold-standard of hussycore.
Trips to the library
I tried to get on the Libby bandwagon—I really did—but there are only so many waitlists a girl can tolerate before cracking. Good riddance! Mama loooooooves reserving books online. When I roll up to my local library and walk to my little cubby on the first floor with MY name on it—bitch, that shit feels like BOTTLE SERVICE, okay. VIP. I keep my sunglasses ON, you know what I’m saying? I hand over my library card like it’s a fuckin’ AmEx Platinum card. My little plastic cubby might as well be a roped-off table at The Polo Lounge. “They know me here.” Do you know how hard it is to feel special these days? En esta economia? THANK YOU, Harris Country Public Library. You are, and always will be, the most luxurious simple pleasure of all.
Bathroom Ghosts
I am OBSESSED with bathroom ghosts and plumbing horror. Faucets dripping. Toilets flushing on their own. Blood spewing from faucets. Sewers! Western culture and Hollywood have a history of assigning bathrooms as a portal to fear, crimes, and emotion. For decades, it was taboo to film bathroom scenes. For centuries, it was considered vulgar to discuss what goes on in a bathroom. Because of this, we still associate bathrooms with the unknown. A closed door. An isolation. A place where bullies hang out. A portal, literally. (To be fair, the CDC cites bathrooms as the most dangerous room in the house, but only for safety reasons.) This semester, I’m teaching an elective on GHOSTS, and in my research, I have fallen in love with all things “bathroom” in the ghostly realm. Aka Manto. Candyman. Hanako-San. Moaning Myrtle. Remind me to do a deep-dive post on bathrooms in pop culture. I feel like I’m off to a good headstart already.
STREET ART and “tagging” via Embroidery
This obsession started when I saw an IG post of a person embroidering their name on a cloth napkin underneath their table at a restaurant. I might start carrying a needle and thread in my purse just for that reason, just WAITING for the opportunity to leave my colorful (and ill-crafted) tag on the world.
Dr. Idriss’ Skincare
It’s Sephora-expensive but my god does my skin look and feel AMAZING. Dr. Idriss is one of the only TikTok-famous dermatologists I trust. Yes, I tried her “face basting” TikTok trend, and yes it felt ridiculous, BUT the logic behind it got me through a ROUGH couple of days in Europe when my retinol-spoiled face BLEW UP and I didn’t know what to do. Switching to baby products saved my skin. Long story short, this is one of the only skincare lines that I believe is worth the splurge. Even better, the application and packaging are ::chef’s kiss::.
Alanna UbacH
This is not a new obsession. If anything, it has grown ginormous over time. This fall, I feel the need to remind everyone of the most UNDERRATED, UNDERAPPRICIATED, UNDERUSED actress in Hollywood: the great Alanna Ubach, who has been a screen icon in my life ever since season 1 of Beakman’s World. This woman has dedicated her life to playing bit parts in the background, never failing to shine bright (or upstage) those around her. WHY has she not found success as a leading lady? My guess is that Hollywood spent so many years not knowing what to do with her, by the time they figured it out, they weren’t writing great parts for women anymore (i.e. the last 10 years in film). Alanna, you are TREASURE TROVE of talent, humor, and beauty, and I will follow your career anywhere.
Normalizing Cringe
If you are not currently struggling with depression, anxiety, or chronic cringe syndrome, consider yourself lucky. So many people I know are experiencing higher levels of distress and dread than normal, so much so that I’m starting to wonder if scientists are paying attention and gathering data on this timely “mental health crisis” phenomenon. It feels invasive on a global scale. I find myself CRINGING all the time. What I say. What I do. How I feel. I’m always cringing at the clock—deadlines, schedules, response times, aging. It all feels too fast and too chaotic, leaving no room for my awkward ass to try and “play it cool.” This fall, I have decided to NORMALIZE CRINGE. Next time I say something mildly awkward to a student or employee—thus letting it haunt me over the next few days until another cringe moment steals the spotlight—I will calmly and lovingly tell myself, “This feeling is normal. EVERYONE feels cringe.”
Chucky wearing readers
I’m gonna print this out and tape it to my driver’s license. Fall is back!
HONORABLE MENTION
moon-bathing, red umbrellas, Roy Scheider, Japanese yokai, stethoscopes, Sparkshorts by Pixar, Urban Decay’s 24/7 Inks eyeliner, Greek myths, 80s movie posters, and “finishing” in general.
